my little eyelid dancer

me on the left and you on the

right the way we laid our

 bodies the start of the nigh.

my head on two pillows as

 yours lay on one tired

from the day and all we had done.

one arm under pillow, the other

kept you warm i'd pull you in

close during thunder and storm.

i still remember the sweet scent

of your hair as we closed our

eyes and i held you for prayer. 

the rise and fall of breath

from your chest would

remind me of that day that

god had blessed.

your face would go soft and

lips would yawn you'd

fall asleep with the television still on.

middle of the night your

house stayed warm the fan on

high was always the norm.

i'd stolen the blanket and kicked

down the sheet the only pillow

you had now lay at your feet.

sometimes i'd wake while

there you still lay i'd creep

to your bedside and kneel

as to pray.

i would lean in close as if to

steal a kiss these moments of

affection are the ones that i miss.

i'd sit and watch while you lay

there and snore i'd sometimes fall

asleep with my head on the floor.

you always tought you sleept

without peep instead of counting

them you baa'd like a sheep.

your body lay still kept for the

rise and fall of your beautiful

body that lay there in sprawl.

but the most memorable

part of those sleepless nights wasn't

the snoring, the prayer or absence of lights.

it was the way in which your

eyes would flicker beneath lid

and lash i would try not to snicker.

to me it was funny to just watch

them move as if they were

dancers stepping to groove.

i could only guess what your

mind would dream maybe

thoughts of our future and how

it would seem.

would it be an uphill battle, a test

for all time?, or simply steps in a

stairwell that together we'd climb.

most of the mornings you'd wake

with a smile and some you slept

in for at lest a little while.

but now these memories are just

written in line and filed in a

cabinet in the back of mu mind.

memory of you sleeping, snoring,

eyes wide shut now my

heart beating, bleeding, crimson and cut.

your eyelids would flutter as your

eyes would dance and i'd pray

to god to just give me the chance

to fix what i'd done and to

right the wrong of the poor

choices that i'd hidden for oh

so long.

these are the toughts i now remember

the most the memories in my heart i still hold to close.

times i sat by your side as

night was still grey all

through the morning before

dark turned to day.  

i'd ask him to bless this

love i'd forsaken taken for

granted and stole for the taking.

unfortunately i received a

different kind of answer but

you will always remain my 

eyelid dancer.