THE MONSTER

Solid and safe thoughts are having difficulties to appear

its seems like somehow they are vanished

and the faze starts to get complex

my mind is banned of its functions

it seems that there is something inside taking control

misleading the purpose and making all the rest to collapse.

A reflection of the bad person I´ve been takes form

absorbing my mind in a reality I can´t escape

it´s a broadcast performed by my wickedness and mean

punishing me over and over again for my mistakes

leaving me in an impenetrable toxic cruel atmosphere.

My mind is forced to project all this show and sarcasm

I star to consider the past and the decisions made related to this memoirs

memoirs of what I´ve done and how I´ve treated people near me

memoirs of my life philosophy and how I´ve lived my life

make a strong, hurtful pain on my consciousness.

Having no control over it, starts to affect my feelings

sometimes thoughts are so strong I have trouble sleeping and I feel the guilt

reality shows me the perfection I have in my life with my family

those aspects I should be thankful for and I try to

but suicidal ideas keep appearing and the anxiety takes place

fatigue and pain are present at these episodes I can´t control.

©Flaca